Group and Peer Counseling
The two weeks the ladies’ groups met following HBF, we spent some intentional time in prayer and visiting with one another. We had spent the previous six weeks so busy and rushed each time we gathered. Although we had opened/closed in prayer each time we met, we had not taken time to go around the circle to truly listen and hear what had been happening in the lives of each woman. Therefore, we took two back-to-back weeks to focus on just that. What unfolded was some fantastic group and peer counseling opportunities. All of the women opened up with so much vulnerability, rawness, and authenticity, about what had been happening in their lives. Each lady shared with great trust about a struggle or what they had been suffering or a traumatic even or encounter. Everything from family conflict, childhood trauma, domestic violence, verbal abuse, loss, pain, and grief - were all shared among them. Everyone quietly and actively listened as each lady shared her story. Hugs were given, hands were held, backs were rubbed in support, and tissues were handed out. Others in the group would offer up their thoughts on the matter, giving examples from their own lives and experiences. Without negating personal experiences or cultural norms/expectations, I would share a biblical story or analogy asking them to compare their advice/opinions to that of the biblical one. I would challenge them to read a verse and ask if their advice was contradictory to Scripture or lacking in compassion and understanding. Overall, the women showed great compassion towards one another. Each showed immense empathy and active listening skills, while also attempting to help, assist, and support their sisters-in-Christ. Most came to the consensus that being a part of each other’s lives outside of group was vital and checking in on each other more often was necessary.
These two gathering times made me so proud of the ladies. The fact that the group has grown to a place of such immense trust in one another that each felt comfortable and safe enough to share extremely private and personal struggles and sufferings, spoke volumes. The women each showed great empathy and compassion, as well as wisdom in dealing with one another. Our times together also highlighted that every individual still endured great pain and that our Christian walk does not equal a bed of roses. Our time together was so sweet and our prayers so raw and open. Sharing in each other’s burdens as well as celebrating in each other’s praises was doing church at its finest.
These times together were once again reminders of why we are closed groups. I (Yolanda) am often asked when we will be adding more women to our groups (especially as a few have gotten jobs and unable to attend the groups) or why not - and this is exactly why. It takes literal years of building relationships to get to this point, where an entire day of meeting can be about sharing, trusting, praying, crying, listening, and counseling. (Out of respect to the women I will not be sharing any specific stories the women shared).
These two gathering times made me so proud of the ladies. The fact that the group has grown to a place of such immense trust in one another that each felt comfortable and safe enough to share extremely private and personal struggles and sufferings, spoke volumes. The women each showed great empathy and compassion, as well as wisdom in dealing with one another. Our times together also highlighted that every individual still endured great pain and that our Christian walk does not equal a bed of roses. Our time together was so sweet and our prayers so raw and open. Sharing in each other’s burdens as well as celebrating in each other’s praises was doing church at its finest.
These times together were once again reminders of why we are closed groups. I (Yolanda) am often asked when we will be adding more women to our groups (especially as a few have gotten jobs and unable to attend the groups) or why not - and this is exactly why. It takes literal years of building relationships to get to this point, where an entire day of meeting can be about sharing, trusting, praying, crying, listening, and counseling. (Out of respect to the women I will not be sharing any specific stories the women shared).
Getting Back to Basics
After the two weeks of intentional prayer and group/peer counseling, we returned to our regular schedule of Bible study and fellowship. However, we have been doing things a little differently lately. I have not been preparing specific Bible studies, but rather, we have been gathering to have times of “being in the hot seat” as we call it. We all read a meatier chapter of Scripture and each lady shares her understanding of that passage. I (Yolanda) then jot down if the lady said something not quite accurate or if she gave a “correct answer,” but too simply. I then return to each lady and ask “why” she believes “a, b, c, d” or to explain her answer in more detail. In some cases, it’s helping the person get to the true meaning and understanding by allowing them to read multiple Scriptures on the topic. Other times, it’s playing devil’s advocate and challenging the person what they believe to ensure they truly understand the issue or topic at hand.
Another week, I ask different salvation/essential and belief related questions. “How are we saved?”, “Why?”, “Is that all?”, “What does that mean?”, “Are you sure?”, “Where does it say that in Scripture?” “Explain yourself?” I have also been challenging each woman on church and denomination specific beliefs and traditions. I don’t tell them if something is right or wrong, but rather, question why they believe that certain thing. I’m challenging them to think for themselves and to have biblical literacy. They all know the “Sunday school answers,” but I’m pushing them to know why they believe that and not just because I said so. Sometimes they directly ask me if “x, y, z” in their church is wrong. I don’t answer them, but instead open it to the group to discuss and then we open to several Scripture passages to read. Then I ask what they think and why. Out of these teaching times, wonderful discussion and conversation have taken place. The women represent many different denominations and schools of thought, not to mention one is a Muslim. All of which have made for very interesting learning opportunities.
We call these times, “sitting in the hot seat” because it’s uncomfortable. The topics are hard, personal, and difficult to digest. When a question seems especially difficult to answer, all the ladies begin to blow toward the one to whom the question was asked, pretending to stoke the fire. The women joke that they need a glass of water to cool down or need to stand up from the hot seat. There is laughter to break the tension during these times.
Obviously these times have challenged me immensely too. I can prepare for a Bible study, but these times can lead down many different rabbit trails, forcing me to do much research in advance to be prepared to turn to certain passages in Scripture or lead the conversation in a certain direction, etc. I never know which questions the ladies will ask or how they will interpret a certain passage. I never know how they will respond or how their own experiences have molded their belief systems. Although these unknowns prove a challenge, they also create wonderful opportunities for learning. You would think you’d only find these types of interactions in Bible classes at high school, college, or even seminary level classes, but instead, these conversations are taking place among African women, some who speak no English, some who struggle to read, some who have never made it to high school, and all who would be considered uninterested in these types of topics. These women never cease to amaze me! Please continue to pray for them, for their continued desire to learn and grow and ask questions. Pray that they may impart this type of desire and knowledge to those around them and within their realms of influence. Pray that this discipleship would be a part of their everyday lives among others.
Another week, I ask different salvation/essential and belief related questions. “How are we saved?”, “Why?”, “Is that all?”, “What does that mean?”, “Are you sure?”, “Where does it say that in Scripture?” “Explain yourself?” I have also been challenging each woman on church and denomination specific beliefs and traditions. I don’t tell them if something is right or wrong, but rather, question why they believe that certain thing. I’m challenging them to think for themselves and to have biblical literacy. They all know the “Sunday school answers,” but I’m pushing them to know why they believe that and not just because I said so. Sometimes they directly ask me if “x, y, z” in their church is wrong. I don’t answer them, but instead open it to the group to discuss and then we open to several Scripture passages to read. Then I ask what they think and why. Out of these teaching times, wonderful discussion and conversation have taken place. The women represent many different denominations and schools of thought, not to mention one is a Muslim. All of which have made for very interesting learning opportunities.
We call these times, “sitting in the hot seat” because it’s uncomfortable. The topics are hard, personal, and difficult to digest. When a question seems especially difficult to answer, all the ladies begin to blow toward the one to whom the question was asked, pretending to stoke the fire. The women joke that they need a glass of water to cool down or need to stand up from the hot seat. There is laughter to break the tension during these times.
Obviously these times have challenged me immensely too. I can prepare for a Bible study, but these times can lead down many different rabbit trails, forcing me to do much research in advance to be prepared to turn to certain passages in Scripture or lead the conversation in a certain direction, etc. I never know which questions the ladies will ask or how they will interpret a certain passage. I never know how they will respond or how their own experiences have molded their belief systems. Although these unknowns prove a challenge, they also create wonderful opportunities for learning. You would think you’d only find these types of interactions in Bible classes at high school, college, or even seminary level classes, but instead, these conversations are taking place among African women, some who speak no English, some who struggle to read, some who have never made it to high school, and all who would be considered uninterested in these types of topics. These women never cease to amaze me! Please continue to pray for them, for their continued desire to learn and grow and ask questions. Pray that they may impart this type of desire and knowledge to those around them and within their realms of influence. Pray that this discipleship would be a part of their everyday lives among others.
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Ministry Building
Wohoo! We have great news! Finally, after 19 months, we are getting back to finishing the ministry building. We shouldn’t be surprised that this is how long it has taken just to get restarted, but with how unprecedentedly fast the building went up (six weeks), we had high hopes - our first mistake. We had hoped the building would be completed while we were stateside last year. But the contractor was dragging his feet and finally reached out, explaining he’d prefer to complete the building upon our return to Zimbabwe to ensure everything was done to our standards. We agreed, especially because we did not want to add one more thing to Janeece’s plate during her missionary relief of us. Once we returned (August 2023), we had hoped to get started immediately, but one thing after another was getting in our way to be present for the work. Finally as our schedule opened up (by end of October 2023), we reached out again attempting to get them to come and get started. Unfortunately, the main guy was out of the country in Tanzania overseeing a major project in training non-profits on how to build these prefab buildings. Then my health got poor and I ended up having surgery and we were unavailable for two months for this project. The new year (2024) came around and still we had not started. We reached out again. Finally someone was sent to meet with us. We went over all the improvements, changes, and undone work. Then we heard nothing for weeks upon weeks even though we kept reaching out. At this point, our patience was waning. Then another individual was sent and once again ALL the information needed to be shared again. Measurements of cupboards, paint colors, fixtures, adjustments, improvements, corrections, etc., etc., etc. More WhatsApp messages were sent back and forth between countries and multiple employees. We were starting to feel like everything we had already paid for was never actually going to get done. We made phone calls and once again someone (or rather a team) was sent to meet with us. Again, we went over it all step by step and then finally, a week after they said a painter would arrive, he finally did. This last week, a painter has been staying here, filling cracks, plastering corrections, and painting the ceiling. This week, the painter has been painting the interior walls, window frames, and burglar bars. Hopefully, next the external part of the structure will be touched up and bathrooms painted..
We expect to see electricians, builders, carpenters, and plumbers over the next several weeks in hopes of finally finishing up the building. The deadline for the building has moved many times - before we return to Zimbabwe (2023), before the end of the year (2023), before our mission team arrives (April), before the next event, and now finally hopefully before we leave to return to the US again. On the positive side, things are actually happening now and we are confident that the building will in fact be completed.
We expect to see electricians, builders, carpenters, and plumbers over the next several weeks in hopes of finally finishing up the building. The deadline for the building has moved many times - before we return to Zimbabwe (2023), before the end of the year (2023), before our mission team arrives (April), before the next event, and now finally hopefully before we leave to return to the US again. On the positive side, things are actually happening now and we are confident that the building will in fact be completed.
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